Week 3 No Scale Challenge: Stop trying to hit a moving target

TRUTH:  You will never have your perfect body.

Do you know why?  Because your idea of what's perfect is ever changing.  It's like trying to hit a moving target  I remember when my goal was, "If only I could get down to 145," then that became, "If Only I could get down to 135" and even when I was at my lowest weight, it still wasn't good enough.  

This is how we start getting caught in the mire of body dysmorphia.  All that we can see is FAT and need to do more.

I was so embarrassed about the picture on the right last year because I had gained weight after abandoning ship on the fitness competition business.

I was still beating myself up about not eating perfectly, I had gone out to Yard House with friends and eaten a good meal for Labor Day (including dessert) and I felt bad about it.

Even though I wasn't going to be competing I still beat myself up about going out to enjoy food with friends.  Something I had not really done in 6 months!  Now I look at the picture on the right and hope that I can get back to there!   I want to get back to where I was 2 years ago! To think!  I was disgusted with myself with those photos.  I am so thankful that things didn't get much worse with that mindset!  Health and Fitness is not supposed to be about being self loathing.  It's supposed to be empowering.

Mindset Change:  Be Consistent and Let it Happen

I am proposing that you have a mindset change.  Stop trying to hit the moving target of having a perfect body because the second you start thinking you're doing something you will go on social media and start comparing yourself to another and then you're vowing to work harder to look like whomever.

 You also need to have a mindset change when it comes to control.  Instead of giving yourself the illusion of control with perfect meal planning, never missing a workout, and annihilating yourself mentally and physically.  I propose to you the methodology of consistency.

We know that stress wreaks havoc on the body.  Stressing out about food, weight, and such is a stressor.  Getting on the scale and being anxious about what it will say is a stressor.  None of that will help you in your fat loss goals.  It just makes things worse.  White knuckling about eating something "off plan" or missing a workout due to the enjoyment of life will not help you.

What will help is being consistent.  This goes for everyone.  If you are CONSISTENTLY making the BETTER choice when it comes to your nutrition and exercise, then you will notice the fruits of that adding up over time.  I am so tired of these quick fix scams that prey on people.  No there's no magic supplement or magic workout that will give you the results you're looking for in 20 minutes. 

Consistency is what will give you the results you're looking for.  Consistently eating whole foods vs pastries and fast food will lead to better results.  Consistently exercising instead of going home to watch hours of television will lead to better results over time.

IT IS ABOUT WHAT YOU DO CONSISTENTLY AND NOT THESE QUICK FIX 40 DAY MIRACLES.

The Illusion of Control

You don't have control over how your body decides to respond.  That's why it is often fruitless to set goals such as: I want to lose 10 pounds in 6 weeks.  Well what if your metabolism says "No.  We're on a slowdown" from all your calorie restriction and we want to hold on to every calorie that you take in OR what happens if your body decides it wants to lose 5 pounds in 6 weeks, are you going to try to FORCE yourself to lose more?  You can use unhealthy methods but those "get by" options are just going to cost you more over time.

What you do have control over are the CHOICES you make CONSISTENTLY and that's where it stops and ends.  The Fitness Industry MUST STOP promoting ALL OR NOTHING mentalities because after a while NOTHING seems like the best option.

No Scale, No Stress

Even though I am curious and would like to know where I am with my progress, I am also glad NOT to know.  It feels so much better to be eating fresh food, enjoying exercise, and focusing on how much better I feel.  In that picture above, I was still obsessed with food, paranoid about missing a workout, and generally unhappy with myself.

So I will take eating real food, enjoying/progressing in my workouts, and feeling pretty good about myself over the 15 pounds.  Do I want to lose the 15 pounds?  Yes but I've decided that the best way to do that is to be consistent with what I am doing now.  I for sure think my diet is much healthier now than in that photo above and I KNOW my mindset is WAY BETTER and that's what counts.

As I told someone this past weekend, I am feeling so much better...it won't be long before I start looking better as well but it's much more important for  me to get my MIND RIGHT than to look a certain way.  

In my economy, HEALTH is more important than looks.

As Scott Abel said and the counselor I spoke with told me, we have to accept that the process will take longer than we would like.  I was told to expect that it would take 6 - 9 months to get back to normal.  We are currently beginning Month 4 and I am determined to be consistent about getting back to a healthy mindset!

I'm always available if you want to reach out.  There are so many people who are suffering in silence and you don't have to anymore!

Week 2: No Scale Challenge. Why I am speaking out PLUS a fun workout for you to try!

In my last Blog Post I made the following comment:

I'm going to take it one step further and say that there are far too many people in the fitness industry that are always negative about their bodies or preaching about perfectionism and that is a terrible message to send to clients.  

People have much bigger problems than six pack abs and butts.  They have family troubles, stressful jobs, relationship issues, financial issues, stress, and yet the industry continues to market magic beans, workouts, and meal plans as the answer to real problems.

At this moment I am reading a book by Zig Ziglar where he says selling is the transference of feeling.  He goes on to talk about how if you're going to be convincing to people then you need to BE CONVINCED of what you're saying.

I had an a-ha moment

It's about The "Why"

It's not about resisting cookies, candy, and french fries and white knuckling it.  It's about "WHY". Why do people eat when they are stressed, lonely, or bored?  It isn't because they are physically hungry.  What ARE they hungry for?  Why are people punishing themselves with 2-3 hours of exercise every day and annihilating their muscles in pursuit of a "perfect"  that doesn't exist. Why do people need to CONSTANTLY post selfies every single day?

Why?

My Why

I've shared my own WHY:  It was because I was afraid of getting fat, ruining my life, and I was also seeking validation. I could do every meal plan and workout until the cows came home but until I actually addressed the REAL issues which were fear of weight gain and the need to seek validation, there would be no resolve.  It would be around the same mountain over and over again.

Why it's Important for me to Speak Out

It's important for me to speak out because I can guarantee you there are many women AND men who are caught up just like I was.  They are caught up in trying to find solace, validation, and affirmation in the physical and torturing themselves about food and exercise.  It's something we don't talk about but it needs to be addressed.

People are suffering in silence and they are inundated on social media daily with memes, videos, advertisements and soapbox coaches that tell them all they need is discipline and this amazing program that they are selling.

Sidenote:  There was a GREAT article on T-Nation last week where the blogger called out all these coaches who preach to followers about discipline and posting their nearly naked shredded to the bone pictures.  These people fail to add that they have chemical aid  to look the way they do. 

It's important for me to speak out about this because people will continue to suffer with eating disorders and body dysmorphia and think it is the norm.  I believe that the Fitness Industry is beginning to normalize disordered eating and obsessive exercise practices.  None of it is healthy.

It goes back to my A-ha Moment

It's the Blind Leading the Blind

What would happen if we let current alcoholics lead AA meetings?  How about current drug users leading recovery meetings?  We wouldn't let that happen because people who have not recovered themselves have no business leading others who are still in the midst and so fragile.  

In the fitness industry we have too many people who are suffering from body dysmorphia and disordered eating patterns with platforms and it's doing a real disservice to clients.  People think they need these complicated meal plans, magic supplements, and exercise routines in order to improve their health.

How about eating fresh foods, drinking water, and moving on a more consistent basis?  How about if you are an avid exerciser that we focus on making sure you are stimulating your muscles properly with a training program suited for YOUR needs and body type.  How about we work on improving YOUR nutrition not with complicated meal plans but with a CONSISTENT meal plan that you can sustain.

When you have people who are consumed with having the "perfect" body, disordered eating patterns, and body dysmorphia issues, teaching people what do you THINK is going to happen? When the Blind are leading the Blind they will BOTH fall into a ditch!

That's why I am going to continue on preaching that there is no perfect body.  There is no ONE STANDARD of beauty and we need to accept ourselves no matter what!

That is why I am feeling so STRONGLY about speaking out against this pervasive nonsense and getting people to focus on REAL LIFE IN THE REAL WORLD.  Focusing on cosmetics when the rest of your life is in free fall is putting a band aid on a gunshot wound.  

83% of people are not active.  That's a lot of people.  Even more do not eat fresh foods and more people than ever are suffering from stress related issues.  Those of us in this industry need to get REAL and we need to show more empathy to clients so that we can meet people where they are.

Second Week with No Scale

I have to say in many ways it was easier this past week not to get on the scale but I did have times where I just wanted to see what I weighed.  Is there ANY progress?  Why is it taking so long?  I have to remind myself that I was in a deficit for a year and it will take some time to get things "turned up" again.

I am FEELING a difference so whether there is or not....I'm just gonna roll with it.

Diet 

My diet now is something that I can sustain for the rest of my life.  It's real food and on Sundays I eat what I would like.  I no longer have food obsessions or have anxiety about foods.  I eat food and move on with my life.

Workout

Going well.  Love the stimulate don't annihilate philosophy!  I really FEEL what I am working and boy do I sweat!  It's not about how much you lift but HOW you're lifting.  This past Saturday I did the Abel 30 from Scott Abel and Boy was it tough.  50 pounds on the leg press isn't impressive but when you slow it down and go full range of motion it's TOUGH.

Here's the Abel Challenge if you would like to try it.

 30 Leg Presses

 30 Front Squats (Butt to Heel)

 30 Barbell Walking Lunges

 30 Ball Bridges (any hamstring exercise works

When I finished I was super sweaty and I felt so ALIVE!  It was awesome and it will help me get my endurance back to where it needs to be.

Until the Next Time!  

Thank you all so much for reading, reaching out, and commenting.  I really appreciate it!