Have you reached a decision?

As we PUSH on towards GOALS2013

The next step of the journey: Decision Time

So to recap the first part of the year, I have:

1. Set Goals

2. Made Plans

3. Assessed our progress

4. Readjusted Plans

As I have stated before, this year is one where I am looking to make tremendous changes.  Change begins with one important step: A DECISION.  Whatever we choose, whether it's to step out in faith or stay the same, we cannot begin anything until we have reached a decision to do so.

It doesn't matter what your goal is, there comes a point where you are going to have to stop dibbling and dabbling and make a concrete decision:  Will you let certain things go?  Are you ready to try something new? Decisions, decisions, decisions.

It isn't like I haven't been here before.  Several years ago, I made a necessary and life changing decision.  I knew it would be tough because I would face criticism and disappoint people, but I made a decision that MY LIFE could not continue in this manner.  It has turned out to be one of the best decisions I've ever made, despite what others think.

Have you reached a decision?

When the judge asks the jury this question, the defendant knows that the entire course of his life could possibly be changed.  His entire fate and life course lies in these next few moments when he hears: THE DECISION.

Understandably, many times the defendant stands in fear as they await the verdict on their life.  Many of us need to acknowledge that we also stand in fear as we render decisions about our lives. There is no getting around it, but we can find ways to cope with our fears and move past them.

Maybe I will just go ride water slides

Decision Time

As I am facing my own decision time for PUSH 2013, I find myself flooded with thoughts:

What should I do?
Is this the right course of action?
What if this flops?
What if this is a total mistake and I ruin my life?

What if? What if? What if? What if? What if?

I wish there was a book on how to eliminate fear, but there's no blueprint for fear.  You either push past it and go forward, or you stay paralyzed and let fear make itself right at home in your mind.  Best believe, fear will come into your mind, put its feet on the couch, and stay forever if you don't do something about it.

Coping with fear

Acknowledgement that fear is the real issue

Finally admitting to friends that the real root of my problem was that I was afraid felt like a load off of my back.  I felt free once I admitted I was afraid.  I was done with the bravado and let my guard down.  The real issue wasn't anyone else, but me.  I was afraid.  I was afraid of making the wrong decisions, afraid that I will flop and look like a fool, afraid that I will regret this decision because I will go 3 steps back when I wanted to go forward.

Once you admit that you are afraid, then you can begin to deal with the problem.

Stop talking to yourself and talk to a group of trusted friends

I live inside of my head.  I have conversations with myself and they usually don't end well when it comes to decision making.  They will start with very logical pro and con lists, and then things end up like this:

What if you do this?

What if you make the choice and it flops?

What if you make the wrong choice, it flops and you end up looking like a fool?

What if you end up looking like a fool and your entire reputation is ruined?

What if your entire reputation is ruined and then you've ruined your life?

You see where this goes?  It's irrational, but these are the conversations I have with myself.  By the time I've finished, I have ruined my entire life and I will be standing down on Market street singing for a dollar.

I have found the best thing to do is to talk it over with friends.  REAL friends...not social media friends.  People who care about your well being and welfare, people who know your story.

Close your eyes and go with your gut

All of the bad decisions I've made in my life have been because I didn't listen to my gut.  Remember all of that analyzing and reasoning that I was doing earlier while having the conversations with myself?  After those conversations, I usually talk myself right out of my gut instinct.

The Pro and Con Lists are great, talking with others is great, but listening to your instincts and that gentle whisper will never steer you wrong.

Feel the Fear and do it anyway

One of the ways I know I should be doing something is if it scares me half to death. One of the major goals I have set for myself scares me and seems ridiculous if I think about it long enough.   I laugh and shake my head that I've really decided to do tis.  A few times I've thought,

You've got to be kidding me.
What am I thinking?
Really...You?"
That's not for people like you

I shake my head and then I say, "Yeah...me.  I'm gonna do it.  Watch."

Let it go

Do you remember when we were kids and you would hear about a scary movie?  You would spend a lot of time scaring yourself in anticipation of the movie, imagining how scared you would be, what may happen in the movie, and coming up with all kinds of scenarios.  Then you would watch the movie and say, "That's all?"

 The buildup and decision making process is worse than the actual event. Most of what we imagine never happens, and if it does it's not nearly as bad as the scenarios we've come up with.

I always feel so much better once I've actually made my decision.  After that, I tell myself I've done what I can do, and now I will see what will happen. I truly believe that the right thing will happen for the GREATER GOOD.  That doesn't necessarily mean that the outcome will be good, but for the greater good it will be the right course of action.  

If you don't decide someone will decide for you

Doing nothing will ensure that nothing you want will happen.  In fact, what will happen is that someone else will make the decision for you.  Maybe you like living your life to please others, but I don't.  I want my life to be my story, not what someone else has dictated for me.  That is enough to motivate to decide what is best for MY life.

The Next Step

I have made my decision, and now I will see what happens.  I am glad that I am documenting this process because I hope at the end of the year, I can review this blog and see the framework for how I achieved all of my goals for this year.  How did I PUSH through?  

What about you?  What decisions do you need to make in order to live your own story?  Is it something scary?  Are you going to hope it gets better or will you take action?